And so it begins....

And so begins my weekend of hell. In two hours, we are leaving for Jackson to sign our lease and move the first load of crap into the apartment. Then, we are making one mega grocery shopping trip, eating dinner, and heading back to Hattiesburg for the night. Bright and early tomorrow morning, we're picking up the U-Haul, then going to my dad's house to get furniture from his garage, then to dad's storage unit to get the sofa, chair, and piano, THEN to our storage unit to get the rest of our stuff, and finally, back to Jackson. All of this, mind you, with a six-week old and two cats in tow. *Sigh*

Our internet is being hooked up by Time Warner Cable on Monday evening, so expect me back then. Toodles for now....wish me luck.

Have You Ever...

Place an X by all the things you've done, or remove the x from the ones you have not. This is for your entire life:

(X) Smoked a cigarette
(X) Drank so much you threw up
( ) Crashed a friend's car
( ) Stolen a car
(X) Been in love
(X) Been dumped.
( ) Been laid off/fired
(X) Quit your job!
( ) Been in a fist fight
(X) Snuck out of your parent's house
(X) Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
( ) Been arrested?
( ) Gone on a blind date
(X) Lied to a friend
(X) Skipped school
(X) Seen someone die
( ) Been to Canada
( ) Been to Mexico
(X) Been on a plane
(X) Been lost
(X) Been on the opposite side of the country
(X) Gone to Washington, DC
(X) Swam in the ocean
(X) Felt like dying
(X) Cried yourself to sleep
( ) Played cops and robbers
(X) Recently colored with crayons
(X) Sang karaoke
(X) Paid for a meal with only coins...
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't?
(X) Made prank phone calls...
(X) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue.
(X) Danced in the rain
(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus
( ) Been kissed under the mistletoe
(X) Watched the sun rise with someone you care about
(X) Blown bubbles
(X) Made a bonfire on the beach
( ) Crashed a party
(X) Gone roller-skating
(X) Ice-skating....

Unknown Housing

Next Friday, I'm moving into an apartment I've never seen. I'm very frightened by this.

Donald and I moved to Hattiesburg the week before Katrina. Yep, bad timing, I know. That's been happening a lot lately, but that's another story completely. Anyway...we've been staying with a few fairies for the past six months because Dad's house was completely destroyed by the storm. We tried desperately to find housing in Hattiesburg, but it seems more than a few people's homes were destroyed, so no apartments have been available. We looked at a duplex a few weeks ago, but it was completely disgusting and way overpriced. So....we decided to move to Jackson.

I like Jackson; there are parks and museums and a few normal people. But...I don't know Jackson very well. We looked at quite a few places, but none had everything we wanted for the price we wanted. We finally found two complexes that were in our price range that had the amenities we needed. Apartment A was big, clean, had brand new kitchen appliances....but the complex itself was kinda ghetto. Plus it didn't have a washer/dryer connection. Apartment B had everything we wanted, plus the grounds were clean and it is in a good part of town (or so I hear). But...they didn't have any units available for us to view. So...we signed the lease anyway. Next weekend we move in. This might be the craziest thing I've ever done. Oh yeah...right next to moving to the coast during hurricane. That was fun.

Forgive me

I've been thinking a lot lately about people who I've not treated as well as I should, as well as those people who have not treated me well. For some reason, I feel an overwhelming sense of shame and guilt about the wrongdoings I've committed in the past. I find myself thinking about these people, and wondering how I can make it right...and then realizing: the past cannot be changed.

The one person I feel most badly about is Brian. God, I treated him like shit without even realizing it. Looking back, I can see that he loved me more than anything and I didn't recognize or appreciate it. Sure, I loved him, but I took it for granted...a mistake I hope to never make again. He's married now, and I hope he is truly happy and has found what he was looking for. To Brian, I am sincerely sorry and I hope you will someday forgive me.

To Donald: I'm sorry that I didn't realize sooner that everything I was looking for was right in my own backyard. I'm sorry I made you complete an obstacle course before accepting you. You've been my very best friend for so long, I think I started to take you for granted, too. For all of this and more, I'm sorry. I know you have forgiven me along time ago, and for this I am humbled. You mean everything to me.

To Mom: I know now how hard it must have been for you. I know you've always wanted the best for your children but didn't always know how to provide that. Every person has their own struggles in life that they must work through, including you. I'm sorry I didn't realize that sooner. I no longer judge you, but look at you as a fellow cast member of this production called life. I'm sorry for all of the awful things I've said to you. I know we will never agree on some things, but that's okay. Love doesn't rely on complete agreement.

To those who have hurt me: I forgive you. We are all a product of our environments, and I know that many of you acted as a part of that environment. Acceptance and tolerance do not come easy in this world; it is something we each must work at every day. It is very easy to hurt, but much harder to heal. My wounded heart has healed, and will do so again should I be hurt again.